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selling out

A mood assignment had landed me in Byculla to profile BMC’s dangerous buildings. Let me take you there-

Year 2009. The month is May and a mid morning sun is beating mercilessly down.

Somewhere past Rani Baug, the photographer and I get off the cab to ask for directions. The address reads Botawala Chawl.  “This only,” mutters a lean boy of around 18 darting his eyes over to a nearby structure. Then he sizes us up with both curiosity and a hint of irritation. He does not smile when we thank him. With a swift turn he is gone. I watch him walk over to his friends and hear his intentionally loud comment.

“Poor India, hungry India dekhne aaye hain.”

The words stay with me long after I have left the chawl. I file my story quietly and lay in bed later that night wondering why poverty has been reduced to newsbits that go well with a cup of coffee the next morning.

To earn the bread and butter that completes this breakfast, I have sold out.

PS- A daft part of my 20-year-old rookie reporter’s mind still wants to do meaningful work that impacts society. Blergh.

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11 responses

  1. Anurag

    Very thoughtful. Its very easy to just accept things as they are, and not give a damn. But its good to see that there’s a passion burning inside you to make a difference.

    July 30, 2009 at 7:09 pm

  2. Kookoo monster

    we are a society filled with voyeurs… and we all feed on tragedy…. and all of us live vicariously while the whole world dies… and stare like zombies into the tele… i say lets flush this shitty world down the loo… *looks up at the dark brooding clouds*

    July 31, 2009 at 1:42 pm

  3. Very nicely written blog and excellent layout/design. Keep us posted with more of your struggle and revealations during reportage.

    August 3, 2009 at 8:45 am

  4. 🙂
    Loved each and every post on your blog. What beat do you cover…civic?
    Must meet sometime.

    August 4, 2009 at 12:03 pm

  5. fullyfurnished

    Thanks Anurag. I am burning out that passion with this post.
    I agree Kookoo monster. (also looks up at brooding clouds)
    @sourav, any struggle shall be blogged about. thanks for reading.
    Arcopol- same back 🙂 now i’m just busy being a bmm nerd. these are internship episodes when i covered crime and did odd jobs for other beats.

    August 5, 2009 at 1:37 pm

  6. Sharvari

    Reality sells!
    When something bad happens, we are convinced it will never happen to us. And when someday it does, we are shattered and put in the same uncomfortable position,which we thought, we would never be in.

    August 5, 2009 at 2:38 pm

  7. SOMas

    aweesome!

    August 6, 2009 at 4:42 pm

  8. well written. at some point or the other we all have sold our conscience. but some day, we will be able to change this situation for the better n that day we wont be this need to ‘sell out’

    August 9, 2009 at 6:45 pm

  9. ridhima

    i love this post! it is very intense and pretty deep and reflects everyone’s guilt conscious to the hilt! i adored it! too good…
    keep it up. X

    September 8, 2009 at 3:36 pm

  10. Hamsa

    It is important to notice that people have developed a materialistic attitude towards everything. It is immaterial to them on what it feels to face the reality meter. Life is brutal. And cruel. And yet, we have learnt what it is to be selfish and be happy with it.

    Maybe we won’t sell out. Just like we stuck to be a reason for Vishnu’s smile, we won’t decide to sell out. We will stick to our ideals, our principles and hard work. Let’s change what this generation would love to stand for. Not acquainting gizmos, but acquisitions of smiles. 🙂

    September 14, 2009 at 1:53 pm

  11. fullyfurnished

    sharvari, right you are.
    somas- yeah? thanks..
    @nishal- i sure hope
    ridhima- i’m glad you liked. it forced itself into to my blog, clear out of my conscience.
    hamsa- the question here is can we afford to avoid selling out. it’s nice to believe we will be idealistic. but i have deep rooted doubts.

    September 27, 2009 at 8:03 pm

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